Here's something you don't see everyday: Claire Danes wearing a bikini. She's vacationing in Italy with boyfriend Hugh Dancy, and it looks like she's having a relaxing time tanning, taking pictures and reading a book spread eagle which would be hot if I didn't just spend the past hour looking for her breasts with a magnifying glass. Are they under the beach chair? I don't get it.

Hey, everybody! Sarah Jessica Parker had her mole removed which makes her 1/1,000th less abrasive to look at. Yay!

As most of y'all know, Fox News didn't reveal all the 'crude' things Jesse Jackson said about Barack Obama into that 'hot' Fox mic last week.

Well, a new report says that in addition to the infamous "nuts cutting" comment Jackson also said the following:

"Barack…he's talking down to black people…telling n*****s how to behave."

This was confirmed to be authentic by a Fox News Channel representative.

So not Reverend like!

[Images via WENN.]

"I’ve always thought of it as an old woman’s name, so I demanded that everyone call me Blair. In high school, when people found out my name was Selma, they’d call me things like Smell-ma or Salmonella. That stuff basically came from friends, and I never really had any enemies, so I just kind of smiled through it. I still don’t like my name. It does not fall prettily off the tongue. In fact, it’s hideous. My middle name is James, and I like to be called that."

- Selma Blair tells the new issue of Playboy, on disliking her name

[Image via WENN.]

Looks like Sienna "Sluttiest One of All" Miller is fucking up Brothers & Sisters actor Balthazar Getty's personal AND professional life.

A friend of Getty's soon to be ex-wife says, "It's humiliating. Rosetta left the country to protect the kids, and he continues to see Sienna publicly."

Rosetta Getty and her four kids with Balthazar were reported to be in Italy.

Doesn't it suck that Balthazar was tramping around with Slutty in Italy last week when his kids were there, too?

Slutbag met Getty through his Brothers & Sisters costar Matthew Rhys.

Rhys, who also got some action from Slutty, was livid when the Italy photos of the couple surfaced, says a source.

Sounds like there's going to be a lot of tension behind the scenes at Brothers & Sisters!

Sluttyienna, continually living up to her nickname.

[Image via Mr. Paprazzi.]

After dropping out of the Emmy race and announcing she "wasn't given the material to warrant a nomination," Katherine Heigl basically shit in the corn flakes of the Grey's Anatomy writers. And now they're striking back. *Spoiler Alert* HER CHARACTER GETS A BRAIN TUMOR. *End spoiler.* Did I do that right? Us Weekly reports:

“[Producer] Shonda [Rhimes] and the writers are pissed at her,” the source tells Us. “It’s their way of screwing with her. She won’t know whether she’s going to live or die.”

While I admire the writers for exacting their revenge, I'm a little disappointed. A brain tumor? (Oh, shit. SPOILER!) I mean, is that the best they can do? I was hoping for something along the lines of Katherine's character falling in love with Osama bin Laden. Together they try to make things work while balancing their careers. (He's a terrorist; she's a doctor. Wacky!) And, of course, there'd be several subplots where it's revealed her character hates puppies, freedom and the laughter of children. I should really write a pilot.

Somebody please give Mushy Fartone a job!

The unemployed actress is a professional partygoer these days. And that's about it.

How sad!

On Wednesday, the former O.C. star was spotted sitting in the front row at the Hugo Boss fashion show in Berlin.

Last week, she was pAArtying it up in London.

She's THISCLOSE to becoming the next Tara Reid!

[Image via WENN.]

CLICK HERE to read up on and donate to a very worthwhile cause.

"The American Parkinson Disease Association, Inc. was founded in 1961 to "ease the burden and find a cure" for Parkinson's disease. Headquartered in New York, the organization focuses its energies on research, patient support, education and raising public awareness of the disease."

saMAN Ronson blows his boyfriend, LezLo, a kiss goodbye.

The DJ visited the recovering addict on the set of her new movie, Sure To Bomb In Theaters, on Wednesday.

These two will never come out about their relationship….because the speculation on whether they are or aren't bangin' bussies is the only thing keeping Lindsay in the press!

[Image via WENN.]

Pene Cruz graces the cover of the new issue of W magazine because she's pretty to look like.

But home slice gives a boring interview!

If you manage to get through all her sound bites below without falling asleep, we'll give you a cookie.

Penelope on…..

ON HER INNER ‘MONSTER’:
“I’m always finding very tricky and hidden ways to sabotage any beautiful moment. And it’s something so internal that I don’t think even my friends or family can catch me doing it. But I catch myself doing it. I’ve had that battle since I was a little girl. It’s like, Uh-oh, here it is again, the monster! Go away and leave me alone!

ON FACING HER FEARS…
“I try not to run away from things because I’m scared of them. When you feel you have to say something to someone, and your heart starts going fast because it could be controversial, I always vote for saying it. With time, you get more at peace with it. I used to get very upset about it, and very angry at myself. But now, when it comes, I just send it away.”

ON THE ‘CELEBRITY GOSSIP MILL’…
“I think it’s disgusting. It’s dangerous and nasty, and bad for our society in so many ways. And it’s getting worse every day. It affects me directly, but I really believe that this culture of gossip affects our society on a much deeper level, on an ethical level. It’s what kids see and hear every day, and it will affect future generations in ways that we cannot even imagine.”