Forged from the remains of the Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter franchises, DOA was born. It is a series of fighting games, known as much for its fighting and its over-endowed, gravity-defying female characters than for any story that is in desperate need of being told. The girls of DOA were so popular that they spawned another game, one centering on the bikini-clad fighters leaving the fighting arenas and heading to the beach for a round or two of bouncy volleyball.

Well, now the fighting, the girls, and the volleyball have been adapted to the big screen in a movie that is sure to send critics into epileptic fits should they attempt to sit through it, and leave fans frothing at the mouth that their beloved characters have been so disrespected, leaving a smallish group (with me as a member) that will smile at just how bad it is and simply enjoy it as cinematic diversion from the big budget disappointments that seem to come out each summer.

I have only a small amount of experience with the series, only having spent time with the fourth version that made its debut on the Xbox 360. I quickly fell in love with the game, leaving with the impression that it was one of the best fighting games that this non-gamer has ever played. Now that the movie is here, I would have much rather played the game for 90 minutes, but there was something that is undeniably attention-grabbing about the movie. I don't know if it was the plethora of toned female bodies, the terrible acting, the bad dialogue, the silly effects, or the nonsensical way in which everything goes down, but I found myself enjoying the heck out of the movie despite recognizing just how pointless it was.

The movie does not have much of a plot, but such as it is, it does seem to follow the game pretty closely, or so I would imagine. Fighting games have never been known for their deep, complex, and intriguing stories. You will generally have a combination of thin threads like someone looking for a family member lost in the prior year's tournament, someone who just wants to fight, someone runninng from their past, and someone looking to take down the guy running the tournament. The tourney mastermind is always some sort of evil genius with some crazy plot to get money, world power, or something along those lines. There really is nothing groundbreaking about the stories, they are all related to the fighting game standards and cliches.

DOA: Dead or Alive opens with the introduction of three of the primary characters. Princess Kasumi (Sin City and DEBs Devon Aoki), who wishes to find her brother, thought to be killed in DOA; she leaves her clan, despite knowing it will result in her being declared a shinobi and an assassin sent to eliminate her. The assassin is the purple-haired Ayane (Natassia Malthe), who makes a few appearances throughout the film. Tina Armstrong (My Name is Earl's Jaime Pressley) is an ex-wrestler looking to prove herself in real combat; she is joined by her father, Bass (pro-wrestler Kevin Nash). Finally we meet Christy (Holly Valance), a master thief who enters the tournament looking for a big payday. On the island where DOA is held we meet the final of the four primary females, Helena (Shark's Sarah Carter), daughter of DOA's deceased founder. Other characters include Bayman, who is nothing more than a henchman, Gen Fu who fulfills the requirement of an aged, white-haired martial arts master, and Zack, a cocky ladies man who likes to think more highly of himself than he should. There are others, but most are just there as window dressing to the primaries.

Also on the island is Donovan, played by Eric Roberts with a rat-tail. Donovan is the evil mastermind behind the tournament. The tournament had originally been formed by Helena's father as a genuine competition; however, Donovan saw it as a way to do some weapons research that he could turn around and sell to world powers. He is definitely not a nice guy, and he has ulterior motives for discovering who the best of the best of the contestants is.

Wow, trying to buy into the story will make your head hurt. It is not hard to understand, and it is told in a pretty straightforward manner, but it is dealt with in such a shallow manner that it makes you wonder if any of the characters have a brain. The easy answer is no, they only have what the script allows them to have, and the script might as well have been snagged directly from the games for all of the subtlety it contains. Despite this, I still found myself enjoying the heck out of the foolishness playing out in front of me. They even managed to work some bikini volleyball into the plot. Gratuitous, definitely, but still a welcome sight.

I think what made this awful movie so watchable is its lack of pretension. It is a movie that knew what it was and that is all it aimed to be. It was not trying to be the next big thing, it was not trying to inject any deep philosophical thought into story, nor were the filmmakers trying to create multi-layered characters that would remain with you for any period of time. It was a movie with a bunch of silly fights, some attractive young actresses in bikinis fighting, and that is pretty much it.

Corey Yuen directed the film, and does a bring a certain visual flair to it. He is a veteran Hong Kong action director who made his English language debut with The Transporter (a vastly superior film to this). The fights are not real world believable, but as fights brought out of the digital world and into a live action facismile, they looks pretty good. Granted, there are only a couple of one-on-one fights, but they are fun. There is the Kasumi against Ayane in a bamboo forest, Christy versus Helena in bikinis in the rain, and Tina taking on Zack as the main one on ones. There are also numerous fights with faceless henchmen and quick one-on-ones with other characters, like Tina and Bass.

Bottom line. I hate to say this is good when you shut your brain down, but it is pretty much true here. There is nothing to really recommend this. There are a number of attractive ladies, some decent wire-fu fights, and a style that was brought right out of the game to the big screen. I had fun, but I suspect that most will not. This is a very bad, very dumb action picture that you can have fun with in the right frame of mind.

Mildly Recommended.

Christopher Beaumont spends much of his time writing about entertainment when he isn’t sitting in a movie theater. He is known around the office as the “Movie Guy” and is always ready to talk about his favorite form of entertainment and offer up recommendations. Interests include science fiction, horror, and metal music. His writings can be found at Draven99’s Musings, as well as Film School Rejects.

This week's show (Sundance Channel, 9pm Tue) introduces us to a new concept, cradle to cradle. Simply put, many of the products we use come from the ‘cradle’ of the planet in the form of natural but not renewable or sustainable resources such as hydrocarbons, and end up in the ‘grave’ of the planet's landfills. Cradle to cradle is to use renewable resources, and use them in such a way that when the product reaches the end of its useful life the component parts can once again return to their original raw material.

As Frederic Scheer (CEO of Cereplast) points out, plastic is a wonder material, and its uses are almost endless, but what happens to it when it has reached the end of its useful life? In the case of a supermarket plastic bag, the useful life may be 30 minutes, or however long it takes you to get your groceries home. The next step for the bag is the landfill. Fifty or a hundred years from now, that bag is still there. From plastic bags to entire motor cars, there is a sustainable answer.

"Paper or Plastic" features three people that are embracing the cradle to cradle concept, and making a great name for themselves in the process. One such person is Jay Bolus, who helped develop McDonough Braungart Design Chemistry’s “Cradle to Cradle” benchmarking methodology. “Cradle to Cradle” certification is a tool used to evaluate the impact chemicals and materials have on human and environmental health throughout their life cycles. Bolus, MBDC, and the United States Postal Service have teamed up to reduce the USPS’ environmental footprint by eliminating toxic inks, adhesives, and coatings from its packaging.

Also from MBDC we get to meet the design team for the concept Ford Model U, a car designed to be eco-friendly and ‘cradle to cradle’. Non-polluting, the Model U uses hydrogen as its fuel. All of the components use low eco-impact materials, and are fully recyclable.

Cereplast is a company with a vision. They are manufacturing the raw materials for a biodegradable plastic. A frightening statistic is that each year the US alone disposes of 25,000,000,000 Styrofoam cups, and these all end up in the landfill. Frederic Scheer (CEO) has a solution; using corn, starches, and other renewable and non toxic materials, he creates biodegradable plastic. Depending on the end product it will biodegrade to ‘worm food’ within 60-180 days.

I had the opportunity to conduct a brief interview with this visionary.

You produce an eco-friendly version of plastic. Where did you get the initial idea from?

As a 15-year veteran in the bio-plastic industry, I could see that there was a trend toward biodegradable and compostable plastic products across many industries, especially in North America. Cereplast, which is the combination of the words "cereal" and "plastic," was born from that belief.

What is the average ‘degrade’ time back to its basic components?

Cereplast resin is certified compostable and biodegradable by the Biodegradable Products Institute, which means it "returns to earth" in 180 days or less when placed in an industrial compost facility. The Cereplast resin meets the ASTM D6400 test method standard for biodegradability and compostability. Cereplast does encourage composting of products made of its resin.

In Big Ideas For A Small Planet, there are shots of cups, plates, and takeout containers. Could your product be used for larger items? A replacement for the product used to cushion items like TVs and stereo components that currently come with masses of Styrofoam?

Yes. Products of all forms are very likely future applications of Cereplast resins, not just food service packaging. Our future markets extend beyond food service to include medical device, automotive, consumer electronics, and cosmetics, among others.

How do manufacturing costs compare to more traditional materials?

In many cases, the cost of the Cereplast resin is comparable to traditional plastic resins. Since Cereplast is starch-based rather than petroleum-based, the cost is not subject to fluctuation based on the price of fossil fuels. The manufacturing process for Cereplast resins takes place at a lower heat than that required for manufacturing with traditional plastics, further bringing down manufacturing costs.

Obviously your products will biodegrade, but can you also recycle it? Is it possible to take used cups/plates etc, and manipulate them back into usable raw material?

Products made from the Cereplast resin are best suited for placement in compost, where they will break down and return to the soil.

Big Ideas For A Small Planet is a great show, and well worth the 30-minute investment. If you cannot get the Sundance Channel on your cable network, you can pick up most of the segments on their web page.