Water vapour has been found in the atmosphere of a Jupiter-like planet outside our solar system.

Auster postulates a novel and quite ingenious way to reformulate the ‘meaning’ of a fundamental shift in Iraq policy (”What We Need To Do In Iraq“):
Since 2004 a government has been created, and untold resources have gone into training the Iraqi army and security forces, but the Iraqi entity is still unable to protect the […]

Captivity

Directed by: Roland Joffe
Written by: Larry Cohen and Joseph Tura
Starring: Elisha Cuthbert, Daniel Gillies, Pruitt Taylor Vince
At: suburban theaters
Running time: 85 minutes
Rated: R (strong violence, torture, pervasive terror, grisly images, language, and some sexual material)
One star

By Ty Burr
Globe Staff

Scarier than anything in "Captivity" was the drive to Danvers I had to go through to see it. The new horror film, a wan, derivative entry in the torture-porn cycle, didn?t screen for critics and is playing only in a few suburban multiplexes before scampering to DVD. This is what?s known as sneaking into town.

It?s a "Saw" rip-off with less smarts. (Take a moment, please, to allow that sentence to sink in.) Jennifer (Elisha Cuthbert of "24" and several not-so-hot movies) is a supermodel taken captive by a mysterious hooded man (Pruitt Taylor Vince); she awakens in a dungeon outfitted with surveillance cams and file drawers that pop out of the wall bearing unpleasant things.

Every so often she?s taken to a dank operating room, strapped to a table, and made to watch snuff films of previous victims. At one point, the villain forces her to drink a blender concoction made from eyeballs, ears, and less obvious body parts. You?ll probably want to skip the slushie on the way in.

Eventually the heroine discovers another captive, a hunk named Gary (Daniel Gillies), and the two trapped rats plot their revenge. Yes, it?s one of those movies that deplores sadistic acts visited upon nubile, trussed-up women while indulging the audience?s pleasure in same.

"Captivity" is stylish in a low-budget way, but it?s wholly pointless. There?s a twist fans of the genre will see coming a mile away, not to mention plot holes the characters could escape through. More bothersome is that Cuthbert?s character?s so bland (and the actress such a road show Kirsten Dunst) that it?s tough to care what happens to her.

I found myself caring more for poor Roland Joffe, who has sunk from directing "The Mission" and "The Killing Fields" to this. The script?s credited to Larry Cohen and Joseph Tura; Cohen, of course, is the B-movie veteran who has given us "It?s Alive," "Maniac Cop," and "Phone Booth," but his gift for inspired sleaze deserts him here (aside from the amusingly gruesome fate of Jennifer?s Bichon Frise).

Finicky film freaks will recognize "Joseph Tura" as the name of Jack Benny?s character in the classic ??To Be or Not To Be,?? which means someone?s hiding under a pseudonym and it?s probably Joffe. Anyway, the oddest thing about "Captivity" is that the movie?s a Russian-American co-production shot in a Moscow studio. How nice that the two former enemy superpowers can at last agree on something: that the world needs more crappy horror movies.

The French Film Festival begins at the MFA, providing your chance to see some excellent Gallic flicks that will otherwise not be released in this country. Thank you, Bo. The Globe's Ethan Gilsdorf has the details.

Three can't-miss propositions this weekend, providing you can get past the mobs trying to see "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" (which isn't so bad itself):

"Rescue Dawn" -- It looks like "just" another POW survival story until you look at it through the lens of Werner Herzog movies, at which point it becomes eerily overwhelming. I don't know how Christian Bale does it, but he's a completely different guy in each movie. You can also get your classic Herzog fix at the Brattle, and if you haven't seen "Aguirre" yet, now's the time. A more apt metaphor for our current misadventures abroad I can't imagine.

"Talk to Me" -- Is there a greater joy these days than watching Don Cheadle act? He finally gets a live one in the role of Petey Greene, DC disc jockey of the 1960s. See this for him and for Kasi Lemmons' infectious filmmaking -- and for Taraji P. Henson (with Cheadle, above) -- rather than for the extended, problematic mope that sinks the last third.

"Lady Chatterley" -- Achingly slow, quiet, gentle, hot adaptation of an early version of the D.H. Lawrence novel. In French. Bring a sense of patience and your significant other.

Tonight kicks off the annual "Summer Double Features" series at the Harvard Film Archive, easily the finest conglomeration of hard-to-find oldies, cool surprises, and inspired pairings in town. (My God! Elaine May's "A New Leaf" next Thursday!) Check their calendar and mark yours accordingly -- the series is an education in itself.

I’m a bit saddened by this news. I’ve always found the wigs to be kick-ass, great visual reminders of a once-glorious England, a place where the common law tradition – a cornerstone of western civilization – emanated from.
As such, the wigs command respect.
Well, at least they’re still keeping the wigs in the criminal courts (getting […]

It’s the same old story, the same old song and dance (link via AmRen). In this typical case (which will not get national media attention because racism and hate crimes can only be committed by whites against non-whites), a black immigrant slaughters a white co-worker, the latter having won $10k in the lottery.
Finally hitting the […]

Wow. Every now and again, the media actually reports on very real and distressing cultural developments like this (”Concern Grows In Britain Over Female Genital Mutilation“).
LONDON, England (AP) — Female genital mutilation, commonly associated with parts of Africa and the Middle East, is becoming a growing problem in Britain despite authorities’ efforts to stamp it […]

On December 20, 1971, Larry (the worst interviewer in the history of broadcasting, with the possible exception of C-SPAN’s Brian Lamb) was charged with grand larceny. The larceny charge were eventually dropped because the statute of limitations had run out, but King pled no contest to one of 14 charges of passing bad checks.

If you know your graphic novels -- go ahead, call them comics for snobs -- you know Marjane Satrapi's "Persepolis" is one of the best reads of the last decade. Even the sequel was well done. Both are personal histories, telling of Satrapi's life under the mullahs of the Iranian revolution and her experiences in Europe after escaping. They're smart, feeling, witty, and drawn with appealingly dry black-and-white bluntness. If you haven't read them, go do so now.

Anyway, the news that the animated film version of "Persepolis" has actually turned out to be pretty good is heartening. They loved it in Cannes, in part because Catherine Deneuve, her daughter Chiara Mastroianni, and French film legend Danielle Darrieux provided the voices. Also because Satrapi herself co-wrote and co-directed the film, along with fellow comics artist Vincent Paronnaud. The film won the Jury Prize, pretty rare for an animated feature.

Great to hear, but when can we see it in the States? According to the Hollywood Reporter, by the end of this year -- but not with the original cast. Before you work yourself into a purist lather, remember that all the voices in any animated movie are dubbed, so it could work. Besides, Denueve will reprise her role as young Marjane's grandmother, this time in English, and Sean Penn and Iggy Pop have been signed on to play, respectively, the girl's father and uncle. Not your average Disney voice-over talent.

So it's a wait-and-see thing. Cross fingers they get someone good to play the lead (if you have suggestions, email me and I'll post them), and hope they include the original French version on the DVD.

Here's a link to the film's MySpace page. It's in French but impressively loopy, and it has some nice teaser clips.